Frozen Dogs Swimming In Low Gravity

Morning meditation:

Relaxing, but not much more. Made me a little mellower for the next five minutes.

I think I'm genetically predisposed to things like 30-day trials. It's all to do with that strange quality I have where everything seems easy in retrospect. I meditate for an hour every morning and half an hour every evening, and during the during, I often get impatient, and start cheating - usually I use telekinesis to make the clocks go faster (not as easy as it sounds, it gets really tricky with all the gears in analog clocks, and telefiddling with the digital clocks requires a signal processing background). But then as soon as the meditation is over, I'm thinking "psh, that was cake." And it's pretty much like that with all the others too. Water, crunches, writing, not cursing, not tripping old people. No matter how hard they were to do, at the end of the day I have no doubts that they were easy. Alas, there are exceptions to this rule.

Irrelevant to the previous paragraph (as usual), but it feels like my mind lacks a necessary part for the awareness meditation/Adyashanti's "True Meditation." A background. All my mind has is a foreground. Every thought that drifts by, takes control of my apparently one and only mental process. I'm like a really out of date computer, pre-multiprocessing era. On the other hand, something is watching this foreground, because otherwise I would never snap out of any thought before its conclusion. I would never get to writing this down. The other explanation is that my thoughts are just as ADD as I am and snap in and out of the foreground easily.

I was browsing people's Favorite Books sections on Facebook today to get some recs, and ended up starting Frannie and Zooey by Salinger, the guy who wrote Catcher in the Rye. Salinger is soooo recognizable. Almost instantly so. He's got this style of deep distaste for all characters present. Or maybe not distaste, but he paints his characters very unsympathetically. The protagonist is no hero. And he does it all in a non-humorous breed of sarcasm. Pretty entertaining though. I'm only like 15 pages in so far, so I can't really say anything about the plot.

More silly jokes from writing hour:

Question: Did you know there's no gravity at night?
Mom: Ha. Ha. Ha. You're sooooo clever.
Dad: of course, it's explained by Maxwell's seventh and eighth equations. Michelle, did you guys study that in school yet?
Mark: actually, the causality is in the other direction. It's because we have no gravity at "nightime" that it gets dark. There's just nothing to hold the light down!
Mario: yea, but don't worry, I got enough magnets to last us a while.
Michelle: first tell me, did you stop drinking cognac in the morning?
Chun: wait, really? I can never tell if you're joking or not. Wow, that's so interesting! Wait, you were kidding? Ugh, I almost made it till lunch this time without falling for anything!
Lucy: duh! Everybody knows that.
Perry: yep, Jesus takes it away at night to punish us. Fear the Lord, ye sinners!
Igor: is this recent? Renata! There's no gravity tonight, maybe we should just stay in?
Tina: Mark, grow up.
Manlin: of course I knew. Did you know that I'm the prettiest person in the world?
Zhang Xiao Yi: in China, we never have gravity. Or night. Americans are sad. That's why you guys have so many divorces.
Pei: gravity...nope, haven't seen that one yet. I'll add it to my NetFlix queue.

Question: How many Earths can fit in the Sun?
Michelle: three? I have no idea!
Mom: a thousand? Am I even close?
Dad: a million? That's what it was when I was a kid. Hold up, let me ask Buddha. Actually, soon this question will be completely irrelevant. Both the Sun and the Earth will be all software, no hardware components.
Chun: a billion? Crap, I hope they don't ask this at the med school interview. Maybe I should pre-empt them and write about this in my essay...
Mark: a trillion? Yea, definitely a trillion, plus or minus 9 orders of magnitude.
Mario: a quadrillion? I am so not even close.
Pei: on what day of the year? Today? Let's see, Capricorn's falling, Aquarius is on the rise, Beetlejuice looks a little angry... No, today the Earth definitely won't fit inside the Sun. Not a chance.
Manlin: one over the number of Suns that can fit in the Earth. Ha!
Perry: I don't think. I know. Seventy two million, three hundred and sixteen thousand, four hundred and seven.
Lucy: at least one. HAHAHAHAHA! Wait, you haven't heard that one? It's by Mitch Hedberg. Ah, he's a doll.
Tina: Google Google Google Google Google! Did you say something? Oh, seventy two million, three hundred and sixteen thousand, four hundred and seven, and one third.
Frank: well, it changes because the Sun expands when it gets hot. I know, I have a lot invested in it. And you have to take into account the Fahrenheit/Celcius/Kelvin exchange rates, those are on wild swings these days.
Zhang Xiao Yi: you mean in America's Sun? About ten times less than in China's Sun.
Igor: ...(whispers) psst...psst...PSST! Renata! It's for you!

(Note: I wrote this one pretending I was Pei writing a joke about me)
Mom and Dad are discussing getting rid of Cable TV.
Dad: we don't need it, we never watch it.
Mom: but I want to be able to watch the Academy Awards. And the Golden Globes.
Dad: I'm sure it's all streamed online. I'll find it for you.
Mom: ...but...but...
Dad: it's a waste of money!
(Mark walks in)
Mom: fine, let's get rid of it.
Mark: are you talking about Michelle? I'll go get the knife.