Movies

[Spoilers ahead for movies you'll probably never see]

Yesterday I watched The Visitor. This is one of those movies that lends an example to the idea that just because a movie is decent doesn't mean you should ever watch it or will enjoy it in any way. With my taste, lots of movies fall in this category. Some of these are dramas with a central theme of depression or hopelessness or pain, like Crash or Magnolia and especially The Hours, the last being all but unwatchable. Some of these are movies about political turbulence and/or corruption, such as The Interpreter and The Constant Gardener. (There are a couple of exceptions in this second category that manage to escape being "eh'd" by me by virtue of possessing actors I like, such as All the President's Men with Hoffman and Redford)

Then there are movies that are considered good, but you can break your head open and never figure out the reason why. These are movies like Last Orders, which is like watching grass grow, except they've tricked you and given you a looped 5 second clip, so the grass doesn't have a chance. Gosford Park is another resident in this genre. Men especially should stay away from this movie.

And then there are movies like The Visitor, which have a boring past-his-prime dude reevaluating his life with the help of some semi-unusual circumstances. Think Bill Murray in Lost in Translation or Broken Flowers and take away all of his quirkyness. Or Sideways without Thomas Church's comic relief. Throw in some semi-entertaining supporting characters, but then have the main conflict be something excruciatingly boring, in this case deportation.

Actually, I changed my mind. Not about the dull nature of the movie, it's still a pain, but concerning the theme. The Visitor is about male bonding and complications during past-mid-life rebirth. It's about an old man bonding with a young man, borrowing some youthful vigor to restart his stale life, but then floundering around in a tedious plot instead of being allowed to enjoy his newfound youth. Yuck. Give me more young Tom Cruise blockbusters, young Tom Hanks comedies, and if you want to have an old main character, use Jack Nicholson, whose circus acrobat eyebrows can drag even the most boring mess out of the mud. (Except for Prizzi's Honor, shame on you Jack)

Also yesterday, I finished a movie I'd been massaging for the last 2 weeks - Samsara. This was not because it's boring (though it is slow), but because it requires a certain mood to appreciate. Of course this is true for many movies, but I happened to be willing to wait for this one.

The movie is about a monk, born and raised in the monastery. He's a complete badass; the movie begins with him coming out of a three year three month three day three hour and three femtosecond long meditation. Seems like he's set to graduate to Buddha level 6 at least, but then he sees.......a breast. And suddenly, his whole world turns upside down; years worth of hormones set his brain and body on fire. He becomes restless, he brims with desire to experience the world, he wants to possess the forbidden fruit before renouncing it. He leaves the monastery.

Then, for a while, his life is like the average man's dream life. He finds a beautiful girl, it's mutual true love, they get married despite her being engaged to another man, and he's wholeheartedly accepted into his new community. Seven or eight years fly by and he's knee deep in worldly affairs - raising a child, earning more money, etc., and not averse to it all in the least. But then certain circumstances and certain hints about the world are brought to light, such as other people's breasts and death, and he snaps out of the reverie and reevaluates everything again. And here he experiences and manages to convey such profound pain at having to choose between the two worlds (breasts and monasteries), that I managed to identify with him to the edge of tears. Is there a better compliment for a movie than such, from a miser of emotional display?