Temporarily Sober and Inhibited

Today was a busy day. The first 8 hours or so, I didn't do much. I read some of Godel, Escher, Bach, did some cheerleading for my torrents and practiced moaning techniques until I realized my neighbors were home. They (nerds) need to invent a personal sound-absorption device, like a muzzle but more comfortable. That way you can sit at your desk, moan as loud as you want, or as loud as that 10mm diameter canker sore induces you to (you know it's bad when it looks about the same size and color as the moon), and not worry about neighbors worrying about you. Worried neighbors tend to call the police, as five-year-old me learned back when he threw his first extended tantrum in his first apartment in America, and worried police strip search you for bruises and missing limbs. Which might be one reason why people have police-uniform fetishes.

At around five o'clock I realized that drinking and clubbing was on today's schedule and that tying knots, drawing, learning French and doing pushups while drunk was probably a bad idea. It crossed my mind that perhaps I needed to get drunk first so that these things would seem like great ideas, but I wasn't feeling proactive so I got to work instead.

Today's knot was the Anchor Hitch:


image borrowed from animatedknots.com

It's easy and it works. I tied one to my doorknob and got mild shoelace burn when I tried to pull it off. The knot held, which is more than I can say for the doorknob; it now wobbles in much the same way that I'm going to in a few hours.

It's time to go address the pushups.